There Is Only So Much That I Can Do!

Being a parent is hard work whether you chose to ‘stay at home’ or to work full-time, it is equally demanding, challenging and ultimately tiring. As a parent of two I felt that part-time work would be the more suitable option for my family and work-life balance. However, it seems when working part-time everything within your life also becomes part-time.

There Is Only So Much That I Can Do!

The So Called Perfect Balance

As you may be aware I work four days a week, three of which are evening shifts. This creates a beautiful balance in terms of child care as whilst Paul is out at work during the day I am able to care for the children and then come tea time we swap roles as I leave for work and he looks after the children.

Unlike most people who have a busy day at work and return home to relax, I have a busy day at home then have to go out to work. It can be really draining at times, especially when I’ve had a rough day or have a turbulent shift. I usually get home around 10.20pm and after a quick dunk in the bath and getting ready for bed there is very little time to wind down and relax. Nobody seems to understand that being a part-time worker actually results in having more plates to juggle with less time to focus upon each plate.

Oh How I Wish Fairies Were Real!

Paul will often ask me what I have done whilst he is out at work. I am fairly sure that he thinks I lay back and relax on the sofa while the fairies crack on with the day-to-day jobs.

There Is Only So Much That I Can Do!I tell you, those fairies must be bloody knackered with having to tidy and organise the house, arrange appointments, load the washer, empty the washer, load the dryer, empty the dryer, load the dishwasher, empty the dishwasher, hoover up and downstairs, collect the kids from Nursery and School, sit and complete homework with J, do the shopping, send and collect various packages and ferry the kids to and from random activities to name just a few of the things that they magically seem to get done.

Staying On Top Of Things

I once relied upon using a single paper diary to stay organised and now find myself having to use a family diary, the calendar on my phone and a wall planner to coordinate each day without being late for something or other. It’s endless and often exhausting but without my many lists, schedules and plans things would probably fall apart fairly quickly in this household.

There Is Only So Much That I Can Do!

Being the lady of the house Just call me Mrs Bucket I seem to be the family PA, aka the one that is relied upon to keep our shit together. I have casually suggested to Paul that perhaps he could book his own appointments for hair cuts and such like to lighten my load. He seemed rather adverse to the idea of being without his PA and so I have continued to keep the ship sailing single-handed. Don’t get me wrong Paul works hard ‘on deck’ but he doesn’t wish to stand behind the helm.

The Little Things

There are certain jobs which without being sexist  I find women tend to be relied upon to carry out. From organising appointments, buying birthday presents, writing cards or rearranging the children’s wardrobes, us women are usually the ones making sure that things tick over with very little if any acknowledgement from the blokes.

There Is Only So Much That I Can Do!

It’s the ‘little things’ that blokes simply don’t seem to notice and I think that quite often it’s the ‘little things’ that make such a massive difference.

Finding The Time

I found myself being asked to ‘find the time’ to do something other than what I already pack into the daily grind this evening and rather than responding rationally and explaining that there are only 24 hours in a day and that I simply cannot fit anymore into that amount of time, I found myself shouting and soon after in floods of tears.

There Is Only So Much That I Can Do!

There is only so much that one person can achieve in a set amount of time and whilst I am aware that we have a shit load of jobs to get done in order to complete our extension I just cannot fathom how to fit it all in without having a mini-melt down.

If fairies did exist then I bloody wish they’d fly around right about now as I have a list the length of my leg to get done. I realise that most of the jobs are currently being handed to Paul to work upon once the children are tucked up in bed. I know this isn’t fair and that I should be helping him more but I don’t understand when I am supposed to do this.

There Is Only So Much That I Can Do!

If only there were a few more hours each day then I could finally become Super Woman but as that’s not possible I can only do my very best.

RachelSwirl

24 Comments

  1. November 15, 2016 / 11:28 pm

    Oh lovely, I am so sorry to hear you are feeling like this, it’s hard being a parent and even harder being a working parent and don’t even get me started on the trials and tribulations of being a mummy, sometimes we feel like we barely even have a moment to breathe, it does get a bit easier when the kids get older although as you know, I am a single mum and perpetually juggling trying to keep a million things in the air. I guess it’s just about finding the stuff that’s most important and then trying not to sweat the small stuff.

    Big hugs and lots of love
    mandy charlton recently posted…Why Christmas For Single Parents Might Not Be So JoyfulMy Profile

  2. November 15, 2016 / 11:35 pm

    Ah, I feel your pain. I’ve had 4 years of my daughter at home and the house magically being looked after and then working all evening. I thought it would be easier now she is in school but I’ve taken on another part time job. So I do that, my other part time job still, have my girl from 3pm and I am at Uni part time too. Oh and the blog of course 🙂
    And yet…my hubby still does nothing to help. Sigh. Just wanted you to know that you are not alone. X
    Francesca – From Pennies to Pounds recently posted…Flea Market Flipping – Earn Extra Money Buying Low And Selling HighMy Profile

  3. November 16, 2016 / 12:30 am

    It can get quite frustrating sometimes…(hubby and I work both part-time) he’s the one on the evenings and I have 2 mornings 1 evening..yeah..loads to juggle..but when something similar happens at home and we feel there is no time for anything cause as you say there is only that much we can do we like to put things into the right perspective and start prioritising (that and also take a deep breath! ) 😉

    • November 16, 2016 / 9:00 am

      It is all about team work isn’t it

  4. November 16, 2016 / 8:37 am

    Oh Rachel, big hugs. When we have a lot on our plate, that’s when it becomes harder to realise how much other people are trying to juggle too I think. It’s so easy to get into the mindset that other people just simply have more time than you do but sounds like both you and Paul are stretching yourselves at the moment. I honestly don’t know how you manage to keep so much going so smoothly (I think you ARE super woman). Keep going. It will get easier.

    • November 16, 2016 / 9:01 am

      Thanks Holly I’m far from super woman, I crawled back into bed this morning for a lay in as I decided to give myself a break.

  5. November 16, 2016 / 10:22 am

    I can relate to this so much lovely. Although my girls are a little older now and I work full time hours, I still carry the brunt of the housework, organising family life, Christmas, cooking, meal planning etc.

    This resulted in me melting a bit this week and screaming; ‘Why can’t any of you FUCKING CLEAN UP AFTER YOURSELVES! I AM NOT A DOORMAT’ and stomping off upstairs like a toddler.

    I hope things ease up for you soon x

    • November 16, 2016 / 12:34 pm

      lol I am lucky that Paul does a lot of the cooking too but yeh I get what you mean xxxx

  6. November 16, 2016 / 1:36 pm

    I know exactly where you are coming from Rachel, although my hubby has no expectations of me to do anything if I didn’t do anything it simply would not get done so I don’t see that I have a choice unless I want to live in chaos. I’ve had a mini meltdown on the phone this morning as I’m juggling too much as usual and am beyond stressed. I feel like if I worked outside of the home I would have double to do and I’m fed up of having to stomp my feet to get any help around the house as it is.
    Angela Webster recently posted…Book Review- Quack and FieldMy Profile

  7. November 22, 2016 / 9:41 am

    I know where you’re coming from, I’m currently on maternity leave… which should be all about bonding with baby right? Sometimes it feels like maternity leave is a ploy by the men who rule the world to make women stay at home to do the housework!!
    It’s never-ending, and tough to keep on top of when you’re exhausted like you are and I am.
    Yummyblogger recently posted…9 charities you can donate baby clothes (and other stuff) to in Cardiff My Profile

    • November 22, 2016 / 12:38 pm

      It’s hard work I know. We do share the jobs but there are times when I wonder if he thinks I don’t work as hard him and therefore should work hard in the home.

  8. November 22, 2016 / 10:59 am

    You’re doing a fantastic job! It definitely appears to be a woman’s world when it comes to children and housework but men are equally as able to cater to these needs too. I know that when my partner gets home from work I hand all parental responsibility over to him before I pull my hair out! 3 tiny terrors are hard to manage haha! Amy x #TuesdayTreasures
    Amy & Tots recently posted…Things That Make Me Happy #2My Profile

  9. November 22, 2016 / 1:37 pm

    Found myself nodding along to a lot of this. I work four days a week, usually 1130-800 pm, my wife works three day shifts. She handles most of the stuff with the teenager, orthodontic appointments and such, I take care of the five year old. My list of things to do on the days I’m not working really doesn’t lend itself to having much free time. We are fortunate to be able to each work part time. I don’t know how other people do it #tuesdaytreasures
    jeremy@thirstydaddy recently posted…The Dog Ate Our HomeworkMy Profile

  10. November 22, 2016 / 1:46 pm

    I think whether you have kids or not, balancing time can be a really hard task. I often find that I’m running from one place to another without enough time to enjoy things. I plan to slow down more in 2017 and make more of my moments. I hope you can find a better balance too Rachel, sounds like you’ve got a lot on your plate!

    Sally @ Life Loving
    Life Loving recently posted…Meatballs and Courgetti RecipeMy Profile

    • November 22, 2016 / 2:49 pm

      Thanks we do have way too much on our plates.

  11. November 22, 2016 / 3:25 pm

    Did I write this? I’m pretty sure I wrote this? 😉
    Yes, you’ve taken the words right out of my mouth, I’m totally with you!
    I have so much respect for you being busy with the kids all day then going out to work in the evening, my day is similar to yours except I work from home, so I’m busy all day then once the little ones in bed I start work until late. Sending you big mutual hugs!
    Lianne recently posted…5 Superfoods You Can Squeeze Into Your LifeMy Profile

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

CommentLuv badge