The Truth About Blokes 

Don’t get me wrong, we all love a good moan but I do find it odd that what seems to have been one of my most popular blog posts in terms of readership is one which isn’t particularly positive towards fellas, certainly not towards my husband.

I remember writing the post well, I had suffered a shit day or week and had let rip on the laptop for a good gurn about guys in general.

Men are men and quite frankly it is a well known fact that they are a breed of their own. We may well be from Venus whilst they are from Mars who knows, one things for sure we sure ain’t on the same page half of the time.

Men aren’t like us ladies, they don’t tend to think as deeply nor do they express their emotions as openly. I guess they simply aren’t as touchy-feely as us girls and that’s fine. However, there comes a time when a line must be drawn and we need to come together to settle our differences woman vs man or should I say Venus vs Mars?

Lets be honest ladies, theres some stuff that blokes simply don’t do…

Blokes Don’t Do Tidy

Blokes don’t do tidy well not like us ladies anyhow. Have you ever seen a man using a toothbrush to scrub the grout clean? Have you ever seen a man wiping the utilities to keep them shiny white? Come to think of it have you ever seen a man do anything other than fix or install the utilities? I’m kidding… no really we both load the laundry in this house.

The Truth About Blokes 

Blokes Don’t Do Periods

Blokes don’t do periods, well they aren’t meant to by design but can you imagine a man experiencing Aunt Flow at her finest? The pubs would be filled with whinging wankers high on hormones desperate for a hot water bottle and some dairy milk. But really they don’t seem to understand that bleeding for seven days each and every month ain’t fun nor sexy and the least said about the latter the better.

The Truth About Blokes 

 

Blokes Don’t Do Lists

Blokes don’t do lists, well they might use one which has been handed to them whilst out on a supermarket mission but have you ever known a bloke write such things as a gift list? As for Santa I think if we are honest Santa has a vagina because I’m sure as hell Christmas wouldn’t happen without us women. My hubby is more surprised than the kids when they open their parcels, he’s either forgotten or is completely clueless as to what’s wrapped up under that tree.

The Truth About Blokes 

Blokes Don’t Do Crying

Blokes don’t do crying, well they do but it usually means something seriously tragic has happened such as their football teams lost the match or they’ve been booted in the knackers. Us girls however find ourselves sobbing at stories never mind real life shit. Blokes on the other hand are far more together, they don’t cry unless it’s something really worth crying about.

The Truth About Blokes 

 

Blokes Don’t Do Romance

Blokes don’t do romance quite like us ladies. We are fantasists whereas fellas are realists. They think less of the dirty dancing and more of getting down to the dirty. Let’s be honest ladies, we may dream of romantic dinners, sensual massages, saucy dancing but in all honesty it all boils down to one thing, the one thing usually on a blokes mind right from the start. They can’t help it, it’s just how it is!

The Truth About Blokes 

Blokes Don’t Do Organisation

Blokes don’t do organising, unless it’s ordering the tools into their boxes or perhaps loading the dishwasher in a particular fashion. Have you ever known a bloke organise a children’s party? A holiday? A filing cabinet? Or even his sock drawer? Blokes quite simply don’t do organisation in quite the same way as us girls, their version of organisation seems to be from the school of ‘It’ll do’.

The Truth About Blokes 

Blokes Don’t Do Whinging

Blokes don’t do whinging, well they say they don’t but I’m damn sure that I’ve heard Paul whinge when there’s no beer in the fridge. But really, blokes have a different way of working things out to us ladies, we like to discuss our issues whereas men prefer to solve the problems singularly without whining.

The Truth About Blokes 

Blokes Don’t Do Underwear

Blokes don’t do underwear, they might wear underwear but they don’t do underwear. They don’t care less whether their boxers are blazoned with Homer Simpson or even have a hole in them, so long as are cleanish and cover the essentials.

The Truth About Blokes 

Women’s underwear however is a whole different ball game especially where men are concerned. Us ladies like to have underwear for every occasion and time of the month whether that be when the painters are in or when the children are out…

Blokes Don’t Do Beauty

Blokes don’t do beauty. They might look in the mirror now and then but they think that foundation is something a house is built upon, they haven’t a clue that it’s part of our daily makeup routine. As for the likes of HD brows, eye lash curlers or bronzing balls they aren’t ever likely to understand. Give up now gals!

The Truth About Blokes 

Blokes Don’t Do Shoes Or Handbags

Blokes don’t do shoes or handbags for that matter. They might own a couple of pairs of shoes but the bottom of their wardrobe is never going to compare to that of a woman’s. Us ladies love shoes right? You will never be too fat to fit into a pair of shoes or to carry a handbag filled full of chocolate and that right there is fact. I have boots, shoes, heels, flats, trainers, slippers, Wellies, flip flops and all kinds of footwear. As for handbags, I have stupid amounts of bags all of which are of course essential and will be used at some point in time.

The Truth About Blokes 

Paul on the other hand has the bare minimum when it comes to footwear and other than hand luggage and a laptop case doesn’t do bags at all. Mind you he has a stunning figure and can wear almost anything he fancies- the bastard! He’s therefore far less inclined to favour shoes and handbags than me. 

 

Coming To Terms With The Truth About Blokes

I guess we are all different and some of the above may not apply to a few blokes and I mean a few. However, it’s far easier to understand why your fella may leave his washing next to washing basket and not in the bloody basket when you learn to accept that blokes just aren’t like us women and as much as they may try and fail they will never understand how a woman’s mind works nor will we ever fathom the mystery that is men!

 

Tell Me The Things Your ‘Blokes Don’t Do’

I’d love to hear some of your ‘blokes don’t do…’ suggestions if anything for a giggle as we all need a laugh now and then. You can either leave me a comment below, drop me an email or get in touch via social media.

I’m pretty sure that we aren’t all going to share the same views/ values but life’s a never ending debate and who says we have to agree?

RachelSwirl

19 Comments

  1. February 20, 2017 / 12:51 am

    Loved this post gave me a very good giggle – I’ve definitely been feeling a lot of this lately. It’s great to know it’s not just my man!

  2. February 20, 2017 / 7:27 am

    Haha loved this post!! I’ll admit there’s a slight role reversal in our house. There’s a lot on this list that hubby does do, but I don’t do!! Maybe it’a because I was brought up by blokes??

    Oh and I love the explicit underwear!! Have to get him some of those!! 😂

  3. February 20, 2017 / 6:12 pm

    My man is definitely organised, he has to be, as he is my carer, since stroke and runs the home, he also doesn’t do lists, but often comes back from the shop, without something he went for, when I mentioned a list would save him time, in the long run, he replied, that he is too organised to need a list!

  4. RaisieBay
    February 21, 2017 / 8:43 am

    hahaha, yes, I can relate to most of this. My bloke does write lists, oh yes, he used to mock me and my lists but he’s a convert now. Problem is, he’ll write a list and then never refer to it so he doesn’t get anything right anyway. Oh, and he has more shoes than me, he seems to have a bit of an obsession with shoes. I don’t mind though, the more often he changes them the better because his feet are really, really smelly!
    #TuesdayTreasures

  5. February 21, 2017 / 9:12 am

    Lol this is funny! I think this is def the case for most men , although my hubby doesn’t tick all these boxes. He’s always ORGANIZED, and tidy and I’m the opposite haha

    #tuesdayreasures

  6. February 21, 2017 / 1:19 pm

    I think I’m a bloke…. Haha! I have to say, there’s a bit of opposites happening in my house, because I’d say about half of that I definitely don’t do, but Mr C does! And we are both bad for shoes!! #TuesdayTreasures

  7. February 21, 2017 / 9:15 pm

    Ha this is very true. Men’s definition of tidiness is certainly different to ours, and my husband always laughs at me for how much I love making lists! #tuesdaytreasures

  8. February 21, 2017 / 9:46 pm

    Although I agreed with most of these there were a few that I disagreed with. My partner is very romantic, it is me that isn’t romantic in the slightest. But my partner doesn’t do washing. I’m sure many of us know about that pile of dirty washing RIGHT NEXT TO THE BASKET!! #TuesdayTreasures

  9. February 21, 2017 / 10:17 pm

    I moan a lot about my other half but I guess he’s not bad compared to some! However I found the perfect little framed quote for him which I gave him for Valentine’s day. It said ‘I love you…but seriously, please just pick up your shit!’ I actually laughed out loud when I read it! He chuckled too! #TuesdayTreasures

  10. February 21, 2017 / 10:29 pm

    I do think it helps that we are different in some ways. I find that hubbie keeps me grounded when I am emotional and upset and perhaps sometimes I need a calm and analytical opinion on something. It is only difficult when I want to talk about a movie and all movies turn out to be ‘all right’!!! grrr!

    • February 22, 2017 / 12:15 am

      I think all differences should be celebrated but at times for a comical post then why not have a giggle?

  11. February 22, 2017 / 2:43 am

    You’ve got me with beauty, whining, romance, periods and shoes/handbags. The rest are way off. ( for me ) #tuesdaytreasures

  12. February 23, 2017 / 8:33 pm

    OMG! I think I’ve married a woman! Most of this doesn’t relate to my husband, he doesn’t put his clothes away all the time but other than that he helps around the house. He may need a little prompting but he will help out. #TuesdayTreasures

  13. Accidental Hipster Mum
    February 26, 2017 / 1:33 pm

    Hahahhaha at the tampon photo! My mum once told me men don’t look under anything and she turned out to be absolutely right. My fiance can’t see anything if it’s even partially obstructed!

    #Tuesdaytreasures

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